Living in a strained relationship is one of the hardest things anyone can do. Whether it’s a marriage or a long-term romantic relationship, couples sometimes need outside help to get their relationships back on track. Here are four times you and your partner should consider seeking therapy or counseling.

When Your Values Aren’t Aligned

Everyone comes into relationships with existing values that are important to them. The problem, however, is that the same is also true for the other person in the relationship. Occasionally, this can lead to major conflicts over values and priorities. If you and your partner can’t resolve this kind of dispute on your own, getting counseling is a good way to find common ground and establish a reasonable compromise.

When You Can’t Agree on Money

As surprising as it sounds, disagreements about money are a leading cause of breakups and divorces. If you can’t agree on how your money is spent and saved, it’s usually a good idea to get to a therapist or counselor. An outside perspective can usually make short work of these issues, but trying to fight it out with your partner usually results in escalating tension and eventual relationship strain.

When You Don’t Feel Like You’re Sharing the Work

Relationships take a lot of work, and sometimes one partner will become convinced that the other isn’t pulling his or her weight. This is one of the most important times to seek couples therapy since it can spiral into a lack of mutual respect. Whether contributing financially to the household or helping with the housework is at issue, getting yourself and your partner on the same page about the division of labor is very important for maintaining a good relationship.

When You Don’t Share a Vision in Life

One of the hardest things for couples is deciding on a vision for their futures. Although difficult, this is also essential if you and your partner are going to make things work long-term. If you find yourselves arguing about what direction you want your lives to take and can’t seem to agree, be sure to get a professional involved before the disputes turn into full-blown fights.

There are many reasons you might choose to seek out therapy as a couple, but these are among the most common. Remember that you and your partner don’t have to have difficult conversations without outside help. With a good therapist, you can find common ground and help your relationship flourish again.